I don't really know entirely the reason why, but after I dropped guy off after we had gone to the bar with Brendan and Carl, I burst into tears for the entire ride home.

The feeling hit me not when he told me that I was really really pretty and very interesting (but I was very flustered by that because aaah taking compliments I can't), but when he then asked me if I knew that.  If I was aware of it.

And it made me sad.

Because I don't think I am either one of those things.  I never really have.

So it might have been that.

Plus just...thinking about stuff.


But it was a fun night of hanging beforehand, so nothing bad on him at all.  I'm just...being me.  Being weird and broken and stuff.  He is very sweet to me, even though we've only known each other for three days.

He also told me that I was the best part of Binghamton.

It made me both happy and sad at the same time.  Happy because of the obvious reasons.  Sad because I don't believe it myself, and I've heard similar things and they ended up not being true.


Why can't I just take a good thing and be completely happy with it.