Skype

Talking with awesome person on skype who helped calm me down and I'm feeling much better now than I was before.  I look forward to more skypings in the future because this one was much fun and everything!

Also learning more things that will help me.

Despite the anger that follows, I'm actually feeling very good right now.  


"We both got bored."  Ha, asshole, glad I was boring to you!  You know, that it was that and it wasn't that you were sad about making me sad all the time and that you loved me so much that you just couldn't bear to see me hurting anymore and you needed to be alone and everything like that.  Nope.  I was boring.  I'm so glad it was a shallow as fuck reason, because I did find myself thinking that you were deeper than that.  Ha, I will not make that mistake again!

Man, you just did not deserve me at all.  Honestly, you don't deserve to be with anyone, because you treat them like garbage.  I really hate that you were my first love.  Because you, in no fucking universe, deserve that title.  You don't deserve to be the one I first opened up to, and you don't deserve anything I gave you, emotional, physical, and material-wise.  You don't deserve any of the letters I gave you, because they describe a person who just is not you.

Also stop thinking that the way we broke up was mutual or okay or anything like that.  It wasn't.  You're deluding yourself when you think that.  I am the other party in this, and it wasn't.  You were an asshole.  You lied to me.  You lied to the people who asked about us.  Things you told me were not the same as things you told other people.  You weren't "depressed" when you broke up with me.  You just wanted to go screw around with others, because I just wasn't a fun project anymore, I suppose.  And that's why you were screwing around with people within the first month after us breaking up.  Honestly, I am back to thinking that you met the person you're with now before we broke up, since you seemed to hop on that bandwagon super fucking fast.  It was like "oh, well this chick is around and shit, gotta get rid of Allie because aha fuck her she's so boring now!"  Or at least that is what it feels like.  

You thinking that you were completely innocent and that our breakup was in any way "okay" is one of the many fucking reasons I hate your guts.  At least fucking man up and admit that it was ugly and that you did some fucking awful shit.  For once in your life, tell the fucking truth.  And this time, tell it to yourself.  Because you really really need a serious fucking reality check.

And yes, I am speaking directly to you.

If I ever see you again (and I hope I never have to), it may be really difficult for me not to kick you in the throat.

So make sure I never see your fucking face again.