Wednesday, March 6, 2013

A little better

I feel a little better today than I did yesterday, which is really good, because...yeah, I wasn't in a good place yesterday at all.  Although I am exhausted since I only got around four hours of sleep or so due to having to finish my Methods assignment, but I'm at the point where I'm so tired that I'm not actually sleepy?  I don't know how to describe that feeling when that happens.  (Though I speculate that if I laid down to try to nap, I'd pass out very quickly.  Problem with doing that is that my nap would be at least three hours long.  Herp.) 

This morning I did wake up still feeling awful, but...funnily enough my undergrads helped out.  I don't know how exactly we made the transition, but the discussion about surveys and polling transformed into a debate about marijuana legalization and welfare.  It got very...interesting.  And heated.  And fun, aha.  Surprisingly, my Wednesday class is on the conservative side (I say surprisingly because Binghamton is a pretty liberal campus), so I actually spoke up for my own position because there were so few people defending it.  (I just also needed to throw out a counterpoint because playing devil's advocate is what I do a lot.)  Sometimes I don't know if I should do that, but I can't help it aha.  I know I still was impartial enough or at least did well because the two leaders of the conservative side were talking and joking with me right after class and they seemed to have enjoyed themselves and liked that I argued against them.  I told them that it can be fun debating conservatives (smart ones, anyway aha) because most people I'm surrounded with are on the left, which I like but it is cool to hear and debate the against the other side as well (also depending on the issue, admittedly; I'm much less passionate about marijuana legalization and welfare than I am about abortion and gay marriage so where the in the former two cases I'm more willing to listen to the other side, it is much less so with the latter two).

Methods was very informative today, and I actually feel as though I understand things a little bit better, which is good.  My professor is awesome about asking us how we're doing and what is on our minds and answering all our questions.  He's really awesome and is just good at conveying the subject material, even if I find it confusing a lot of times. 

Last night I received a reply from the Youth and Government head advisor and I really have no idea why I was so worried about it.  He remarked that he wants me to get better and that he has always been worried about me because I always wanted to take on too much responsibility way too early in my life.  Which is 100% accurate.  He also said I could take my time and let him know when I am ready to return and start up again and that I could let him know if I needed anything.  A lot of other really nice things were said, which helped me relax and made me happy.  I don't know why I was worried he would be angry with me.  He cares about me and my health first.  

After class and lunch, Brendan and I went over to a local shelter to grab volunteer forms and look at the dogs that were there.  We talked with one of the women who worked there and she was really nice.  Unfortunately the application to volunteer might take some time to get processed, she said, because it is a county facility, and therefore it always takes longer.  But hopefully by the end of the month I'll be volunteering and everything!  We also saw some dogs that we immediately wanted to adopt.  Man.  I can't wait.  It's so soon when I'll be able to have one. 

I know I said I wasn't very sleepy at the beginning of this, but I guess sitting in my bed has hit me and I'm now thinking about napping.  It might be a good idea.  I'll just have to set my alarm so I don't overdo it. 

Still have a decent amount of sad feels at the moment, but puppies and good stuff today have been able to fight some of them off for now.

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