I feel awful and writing in here is the only thing that is somewhat helpful at the moment.

I really just want to leave and go to sleep for a long ass time.  Or just disappear for a while.  Either one of those would be far more preferable to being conscious and aware at the moment.

But I still have a good chunk of my Methods assignment to finish, so I can't yet.

I just feel like a worthless and stupid individual who is never going to get better and who cannot explain her thought process to anyone around because it is so fucked up and it is never going to change no matter what I do and no matter how hard I try and I just want to go away.


Maybe I'll get ice cream.