Visit

Having my dad over is always a great time.  (Hell, having any family over is always wonderful and always picks up my mood.)

We went to a movie and then out to dinner after sitting and chatting in my apartment for a little after he got here.  I like talking to him about work and politics things because he actually gets interested in them and is really intelligent about issues and it is nice.  My mom isn't as interested in the topics of my work, so I don't really talk to her about the finer details the same way I do with my dad.  Which is fine!  I don't want to bore her, but I am glad that he'll at least indulge me, aha.

And, since I was out with him and talking and everything, I actually ate a decent amount at dinner, and that was after sharing popcorn at the theatre!  He was surprised too.  I remarked that I usually do eat more when I'm talking with someone because it distracts me from the actual act of eating.

I did have a moment of sad, when the movie we were watching hit somewhat close to home, since it dealt with depression and everything.  It was good though, and ended up having a few twists that were really enjoyable.

When talking about a certain subject, he told me things I've heard before, but seems to understand that I'm still undergoing a process that is just taking a while.  That because I trust and trusted so completely, it is excruciatingly difficult for me to forgive myself, which is the first big step I need to take that I just...haven't been able to yet.  Though he did seem troubled when I said that there is no justice/karma in this world, considering the differences in our situations and how unfair it kind of seems to me.  He remarked that there is, but it might take a while.

I don't know if I believe that, but it did make me feel a little better.  I've gotten cynical about these sorts of things, it appears.  Ah well.

I'm very happy he's here.  Even if it is only for a short amount of time, since he is planning on leaving by noon tomorrow.


Unrelated: I'm incredibly worried I may have really upset/angered someone.  I feel like an idiot, and I wish if I did that I could take it back, but I can't.  Maybe I'm just being paranoid and anxious as usual, but I am scared.