Mood swings

Today has been oddly...mood swingy.  So far, and already.  It is kind of weird.

I woke up exhausted and melancholy, but then my TA session was actually quite fun, which got me to wake up somewhat and cheer up more.  We had a fun time, especially talking about how the U.S. education system tends to glorify people it...probably shouldn't, such as Columbus.  Plus it just was an overall good discussion.  We got to talk about the Civil War and everything too, and I just had a fun time with them.

And then I had fun in class too.  My professor was very entertaining, as usual.  He really likes the annotations for my coding - I used the word 'awesomesauce' at some point, and he enjoyed it a lot.  Said he'll have to use it maybe.  Plus, at one point he went "'Murrica," and it was great because I do that way too often and it made me happy.

However, during class, my energy deteriorated, and I became really sleepy.  Ended up getting a coke and m&ms during the break.  Though I only had about a third of the soda and half the bag of m&ms before I couldn't have anymore.  I should really eat actual food, shouldn't I?  Maybe I'll do that before trying to nap, because I am absolutely exhausted.

But then we left and my lack of energy kind of hit me and my mood suffered a little.  Though it wasn't until after people made plans where my sad mood resurfaced.  Because I thought Brendan and Carl and I were going to do a movie night or something tonight, but before I could reinforce that, another guy from our cohort suggested they go smoke hookah tonight.  And the guys both said yes immediately.  I don't like hookah at all and sometimes going somewhere where there's a ton of smoke is just kind of annoying?  So I said no.  Plus, the person who suggested it...I don't really know how I feel about him.  Like...I'm not sold on him.  And I know that's kind of messed up, because he's not a product or anything and I'm making it sound like he is.  Even more messed up is the fact that there's no reason for me to dislike him?  He's nice and everything, but...I don't know.  It might be purely superficial: he's been hanging around us a lot more and am I feeling like the trio is threatened or something?  Or is it just that he gives me a super jocky vibe that I don't really like?  And we're just very different.  But Carl and I are different, so I don't get it.

I told Brendan some stuff, and he asked me if I was okay.  I told him not really, but I'm just trying to push through, at this rate.

The look of pity he gave me was kind of disheartening, despite him saying that if I ever wanted to talk about stuff to him, I could.