For some reason, I find myself thinking about the ex a little more than I have been lately right now.  

I'm really not sure why. 

My roommate is apparently on a date of some sort and while I am happy that he is getting back out there, I cannot help but feel incredibly jealous of him.  It has been only a little over a month for him, and he's already back out there.  Two years go by for me, and the one real chance I had at something new ended up blowing up in my face.  To be fair, that was not my first date since the ex and I split, but still...it took me a lot longer to even think about doing something like that.  

So yes, I am jealous of him, really.  

Plus my disconnection with everyone and everything really has made me just shut down and not want to talk to anyone or do anything and it feels really lonely sometimes.  But at the same time, I feel even worse when I do try to hang out with people, because of how distant and isolated I feel.  

I wonder if I'll just end up a hermit.  

...

Bad thoughts again.  I really do think too much that it really would just be so much better if I wasn't around.

...

How did I get in this mindframe. 

...Good news though: got a new battery for my laptop.  And it is 9 cell.  Woo.