I'm in a really weird mood this morning that I don't really like.  Kind of feeling lethargic and not wanting to do much of anything, but I do also need to actually get work done since I don't think I've done any actual research work since the advisory board meeting two weeks ago.  Oops.  I think I'll go in in about an hour and see if I wanna do anything in there.  Or if I'll be able to, because I really have been having so much trouble getting motivation to do anything for a while, especially at home.  I don't know why.

And I have these weird contradictory feelings about guy.  One moment I'll want to flirt and do things with him, and the next I'll feel weird about doing all that.  I don't know if it is because we're not exclusive or a couple or anything, or if it is because things are long distance only right now, and there's some sense in me that is telling me that's really odd and wrong and everything.  The worst is that logically I know it isn't wrong, but I will have these weird regret-filled spells when I go through some of our conversations and everything.  And I don't know why.  Because I like him!  I do.

Some part of me still fears that I am clinging to him more than I would in hopes that doing so will make me forget the ex faster...I sincerely hope not.  Really.  I don't want that to be the case at all.

I just hope that no matter what happens, neither one of us get hurt.  Really.  Though if either one of us had to get hurt, I would want it to be me.  He's been through more than I have, I think.  He should be happy.


On a less melancholy note, my temp tattoo came in yesterday!  I really want to put it on and see it, and I would love to have it on for the concert, but at the same time I don't want it rubbing off at the concert.  Though it would be awesome to have it and see how it does in public or anything.  This is a trial run!  I want to test out the design before I start looking for places who will go a real one.

We'll see!  I may or may not do it for Thursday.  It would be really cool to have on.