The first few days back at Bing have been largely uneventful, though I am realizing that it is just a return to the mundane.

I'm not sure, but lately I've been having this thought about my future: I want to do something that impacts people.  Something that will make people happy.  I'm not entirely sure if academia is where I will be able to realize that.  Sure, there is the teaching aspect, but even that I'm not finding very fulfilling anymore.

The idea of writing a story and creating a fictional world has always been in the back of my mind.  Unfortunately, I have never thought my creative writing skills to be up to par (in comparison to my more formal essay-like writing style when doing something seriously), and I was always afraid of staring something and never having the drive or willpower to finish it.  Plus the fear that even if I did finish it, it would never get published and would never be read.

I guess fear continues to halt me at every possible turn I could make.

Maybe that is part of the reason I want to incorporate fiction into my dissertation?  Or it is just that fictional worlds have always fascinated me.  They are...cleaner, in a way, than the real world.  And it is always nice to daydream about having magical powers or something like it.